Multi Cultural Couple Counseling

With Rabea Chaudhary and Rulik Perla

Have you ever wondered which planet your partner came from?
Such thoughts can occur in any relationship; however, multi-cultural couples are far more vulnerable to the negative feelings that accompany them.
Rabea and Rulik combine a wealth of life experiences and create together a safe and large container where a current conflict and misunderstanding can be transformed to an opportunity for growth and connection. We will help you reconnect with the deeper undercurrents that attracted you initially to each other.

People bring their hopes and fears into any new relationship. Their views and feelings come usually from family of origin and from previous relationships, where they might not have been fully seen and accepted. In some cases their needs and wishes were met with insensitivity or even violence. These memories and feelings are magnified in the beginning of an intimate relationship.

Those who managed to keep their life force alive in spite of painful experiences are likely to have a bag of hopes which they now pour into the new relationship. These hopes often manifest as unrealistic expectations or projections on the partner. Usually, this leads to more pain and disappointments.

These challenges may be more apparent when couple members come from diverse backgrounds or cultures. The meaning given to basic roles, behaviors, and needs can be very different in dissimilar cultures.
What is the role of man and woman in society and in the family? How to raise children? What are the attitudes towards sex, money, property, job, and religion? Without sufficient insight and well-developed communication skills, deep conflict is almost inevitable.

Combining our Israeli/Jewish and Pakistani/Muslim backgrounds, we encourage conditions where couple members can move beyond their own cultural limitations and allow healing to occur through well-honed communication skills, love and understanding.  


Rabea Chaudhary has a background in depth and somatic counseling psychology from ITP and Pacifica, and law and anthropology. She is an organizational development consultant. A writer, nature-lover, contemplative artist and member of a large family, she lives in Berkeley.


      Rulik Perla received his transpersonal psychology degree from JFK University and has many years of experience counseling couples. He is a trained musician, a software designer, an experienced sailor, a resident and student of many cultures, and a loving, happy father and husband.